The Worst Daily.

Hahaha. “I can literally say, there are some emos behind me as we speak.”

Since we’re seeing an influx of commenters on the blog, I thought I’d dedicate a post to welcome them to the fray. With the way they post, they’re undoubtedly emos. If they plan on sticking around, here’s what they should change:

5. quit talking like this
we get it. short sentences. periods everywhere. we like easy. that’s why we love macs. you’re against against authority, you don’t need capitalization. rebel against the man. that’s the way to do it

4. they’re mac lovers
i had a mac once. i had it for a month, then sold it. why? it feels like i was retarded. i couldn’t do anything. get this you SOBs: my computer is a tool, not a fashion statement. i get it, you imac. that’s great. i make money.

3. fashion sense. like thereof.
you need the bag over your shoulder. sandals and jeans. long hair. your black wire frame glasses to show the world that in fact you are an intellectual. your hair should cover up one eye. who cares if you can’t see? it’s emo.

2. myspace
without you, myspace would die. that’d make this all a better place.

1. pseudo-intellectualism
you drive a volvo. you eat tofu. you read the dictionary. you think the PC is for trailer trash. you drink a white chocolate mocha. you do this all while at starbucks while chatting on your mac discussing the war in Iraq and how the money could’ve been spent for poor kids in Africa.

We get it, you’re Emo. Now go to hell.